A Million Ways
The greatest thing she learned is that there is no way to be a perfect mother, but a million ways to be a good one.
Tomorrow is Mother's Day. I come from a long line of amazing mothers. In fact, I am named after my great-grandmother, Carrie Vickers, who was the mother of nine, eight of them being girls! I try to remember her on days when my girls seem like they are made of very little sugar and too much spice! I knew my great uncle (her oldest) the very least, (though I can tell you he was one adored fellow), but I can attest to the fact that she raised eight steel magnolias - beautiful, strong women that she must have been incredibly proud of. Her ninth child - Carrie's baby - is my grandmother.
I will celebrate Mother's Day with that grandmother this year. She is the matriarch of our family - a legend in her own time. She has taught the younger women in our family enough to fill volumes about motherhood. I've learned all kinds of lessons from her, but maybe the most important is to love fiercely. The woman puts mother bears to shame. I can actually remember feeling sorry for kids who were not her grandchildren. She has a way of making you feel like you are the absolute center of the universe, and she also has a way of making you feel like she might mop the floor with anyone who doesn't agree! She must be where the expression "I love you as big as the sky" comes from. Loving fiercely is one of the ways I know can be a good mother.
I am so thankful I will celebrate this year with my mom, who has shaped who I am as a mother more than anyone on earth. I can't begin to count the lessons about motherhood that I have learned from her. One lesson that I am particularly grateful for is that I must be who the Lord created me to be. (This lesson is also known as "I'd rather be me...", but I digress.) She has taught me that it is more important to be who I am meant to be than it is to be liked. And that it's more important to be who God made me to be than to try to be like anyone else. Oh, how important this has been in mothering. Sometimes it would just be easier to be liked or to mother like someone else would. But I know that being the woman the Lord created me to be is one way I can be a good mother.
I will also celebrate with my Aunt Pam, who has been like a second mother to me, from sleeping on my college door room floor to helping decorate every house I've ever lived in. Aunt Pam has taught me many lessons about mothering, but none more valuable than sometimes being a good mother looks more like being a rescue hero. How many times has Pammie come to my rescue? From the time I broke my nose in her foyer to the time she drove from Birmingham to Atlanta when I was rushed to the hospital when Lillie was six weeks old, Aunt Pam has never failed to be there when I needed her. And I assure you, I never needed her at a convenient time! Cooking, cleaning, moving, decorating, babysitting - being a good mother sometimes looks like working your tale off, and Aunt Pam has certainly done that for me. Coming to my kids rescue, being willing to work hard for their benefit, is one way I know I can be a good mother.
I will also celebrate Mother's Day with my sister, Tori, who is a wonderful aunt and now a fabulous mother herself. Tori has only been a mother for a year, but she's been an aunt for nearly eight, and I've actually been learning from her even before she had her own daughter. Now Tori will tell you flat out that she likes to party, and that actually has a lot to do with one of the motherhood lessons I've learned from her. Tori continues to teach me about the importance of celebrating my children. And it's not just about having a huge birthday party, but about using celebrations to show your children that you really know them. That you see what they love and that you want to celebrate what makes them special! Whether it's birthdays or Wednesdays, Tori has a way of communicating "I see you, and you matter to me" to the children in her life. I know that specifically celebrating my children is one way I can be a good mother.
I will also celebrate Mother's Day with my cousin Jamie, who will be celebrating her very first Mother's Day! Jamie is a brand new mother, but I have to say that already I am so proud of the mama she has become. You don't have to be around Jamie very long to know that she is absolutely in love with her boy, Leo, and I've learned from her the beauty of a mother's adoration of her child. We know that motherhood is serious business, that we must teach and train, direct and discipline, but we shouldn't forget to also revel in the amazing gifts we've been given. I love to watch Jamie beam with pride over Leo, and it serves as a great reminder to me to step back and beam a bit over my babies. I know that unashamedly adoring my children is one way I can be a good mother.
I will also celebrate Mother's Day with my sister, Hope. Hope isn't a mother yet, (and after the past few years with all my children, she's not sure she wants to be!), but she a terrific aunt to Sophie, Will, Lillie, Lucie, and Zoe. We are so thankful that Lillie and Zoe spend time in Hope's care each week. Though she may not technically be a mother, she has the heart of one, and I have learned an important mothering lesson from her too. Hope has an amazing way of finding the child who needs a little "extra" that day and meeting that need. Now I'm sure that as a twenty-two year old, she would rather be doing many other things, but I can always count on her to be the extra set of hands when mine are full. Putting my own needs aside to meet the needs of my children is yet another way I can be a good mother.
I am most thankful that I will celebrate Mother's Day with the four children who call me mama, Sophie, Will, Lillie, and Lulu. I cannot be a perfect mother for you guys. I've tried many times and always failed miserably. Striving for perfection always winds up with tears - mine and yours! But I will strive to be a better mother - focusing on my strengths and strengthening my weaknesses. I will strive to be the mother the Lord wants you to have. Just like the bracelet that I wear around my wrist to remind me of my purpose, I will remember what I have learned - "there is no way to be a perfect mother, but a million ways to be a good one." I love you as big as the sky. May I learn a million ways to be a good mother to each of you.
Tomorrow is Mother's Day. I come from a long line of amazing mothers. In fact, I am named after my great-grandmother, Carrie Vickers, who was the mother of nine, eight of them being girls! I try to remember her on days when my girls seem like they are made of very little sugar and too much spice! I knew my great uncle (her oldest) the very least, (though I can tell you he was one adored fellow), but I can attest to the fact that she raised eight steel magnolias - beautiful, strong women that she must have been incredibly proud of. Her ninth child - Carrie's baby - is my grandmother.
I will celebrate Mother's Day with that grandmother this year. She is the matriarch of our family - a legend in her own time. She has taught the younger women in our family enough to fill volumes about motherhood. I've learned all kinds of lessons from her, but maybe the most important is to love fiercely. The woman puts mother bears to shame. I can actually remember feeling sorry for kids who were not her grandchildren. She has a way of making you feel like you are the absolute center of the universe, and she also has a way of making you feel like she might mop the floor with anyone who doesn't agree! She must be where the expression "I love you as big as the sky" comes from. Loving fiercely is one of the ways I know can be a good mother.
I am so thankful I will celebrate this year with my mom, who has shaped who I am as a mother more than anyone on earth. I can't begin to count the lessons about motherhood that I have learned from her. One lesson that I am particularly grateful for is that I must be who the Lord created me to be. (This lesson is also known as "I'd rather be me...", but I digress.) She has taught me that it is more important to be who I am meant to be than it is to be liked. And that it's more important to be who God made me to be than to try to be like anyone else. Oh, how important this has been in mothering. Sometimes it would just be easier to be liked or to mother like someone else would. But I know that being the woman the Lord created me to be is one way I can be a good mother.
I will also celebrate Mother's Day with my sister, Tori, who is a wonderful aunt and now a fabulous mother herself. Tori has only been a mother for a year, but she's been an aunt for nearly eight, and I've actually been learning from her even before she had her own daughter. Now Tori will tell you flat out that she likes to party, and that actually has a lot to do with one of the motherhood lessons I've learned from her. Tori continues to teach me about the importance of celebrating my children. And it's not just about having a huge birthday party, but about using celebrations to show your children that you really know them. That you see what they love and that you want to celebrate what makes them special! Whether it's birthdays or Wednesdays, Tori has a way of communicating "I see you, and you matter to me" to the children in her life. I know that specifically celebrating my children is one way I can be a good mother.
I will also celebrate Mother's Day with my cousin Jamie, who will be celebrating her very first Mother's Day! Jamie is a brand new mother, but I have to say that already I am so proud of the mama she has become. You don't have to be around Jamie very long to know that she is absolutely in love with her boy, Leo, and I've learned from her the beauty of a mother's adoration of her child. We know that motherhood is serious business, that we must teach and train, direct and discipline, but we shouldn't forget to also revel in the amazing gifts we've been given. I love to watch Jamie beam with pride over Leo, and it serves as a great reminder to me to step back and beam a bit over my babies. I know that unashamedly adoring my children is one way I can be a good mother.
I will also celebrate Mother's Day with my sister, Hope. Hope isn't a mother yet, (and after the past few years with all my children, she's not sure she wants to be!), but she a terrific aunt to Sophie, Will, Lillie, Lucie, and Zoe. We are so thankful that Lillie and Zoe spend time in Hope's care each week. Though she may not technically be a mother, she has the heart of one, and I have learned an important mothering lesson from her too. Hope has an amazing way of finding the child who needs a little "extra" that day and meeting that need. Now I'm sure that as a twenty-two year old, she would rather be doing many other things, but I can always count on her to be the extra set of hands when mine are full. Putting my own needs aside to meet the needs of my children is yet another way I can be a good mother.
I am most thankful that I will celebrate Mother's Day with the four children who call me mama, Sophie, Will, Lillie, and Lulu. I cannot be a perfect mother for you guys. I've tried many times and always failed miserably. Striving for perfection always winds up with tears - mine and yours! But I will strive to be a better mother - focusing on my strengths and strengthening my weaknesses. I will strive to be the mother the Lord wants you to have. Just like the bracelet that I wear around my wrist to remind me of my purpose, I will remember what I have learned - "there is no way to be a perfect mother, but a million ways to be a good one." I love you as big as the sky. May I learn a million ways to be a good mother to each of you.
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