Unpacking Treasures

Our family has celebrated several major life events this month. Watching Tori get married and Hope graduate from high school, plus spending lots of time with family has caused me to reflect on the relationships that have shaped me the most. As I watch my children interact with my grandparents and my parents, I've been thinking how much my Granny and Papa White would have loved Sophie and Will.

I've written about Mee-Maw and Big Dad and how amazing they are as great-grandparents. When I was growing up, they were so young and vibrant, they almost didn't seem like grandparents except for the fact that they loved and spoiled us as only grandparents can. I really can't overstate how influential they were in my life, and I am so thankful that they have the opportunity to influence my own children. And though I completely trust God's plan and timing, I am a little sad that my children won't know my other set of grandparents, Granny and Papa.

I've been thinking about my favorite memories with them and the experiences that they shared with me that I would love to find a way to pass on to Sophie and Will. These are just a few of the treasures that they gave me that I've begun unpacking and sharing with my own children...

• Playing school with Papa on a swing in the side yard. He and I would sit with switches picked from a nearby tree, and "spank" any of the "students" (the metal poles holding up the swing) that dared to misbehave. (Can you imagine how boring this must have been for a grown man to spend hours hitting a pole with a switch?) So, for Sophie and Will, sometimes I will play something that is completely boring to me without letting them know it because that will feel like love to them.

• Eating chocolate chips out of the refrigerator in Granny's kitchen. It was as though I believed this was the only place on earth that had a ready supply of cold chocolate chips. I don't remember ever snacking on these anywhere else, and I don't remember ever being there and her not having them. So, for Sophie and Will, when they are at Patti-Grams and Tato's, the nutritional rules are a bit different because there should be a place where kids know they can always find chocolate.

• Listening to Papa tell the story of Mr. McGregor's garden at bedtime. There is no way to know how many times the poor man had to tell me the story about Peter Rabbit sneaking into Mr. McGregor's garden. It makes me wonder, who first told him the story and if it was one of his favorites as a child. I wonder if the first time he told me the story he realized how many times he would have to tell it. Peter Rabbit and Mr. McGregor are now well-known friends of Sophie and Will as we've spent a lot of time with these stories, but maybe even more importantly, they are now hearing the story of Papa White and his wiggly granddaughter who wouldn't go to sleep without her story.

• Listening to Granny's songs. I think every grandmother has her own repertoire of songs, and Granny White's included How Much Is That Doggie in the Window and A Bushel and a Peck. So, Sophie and Will are learning some of the older songs, and Sophie knows that my grandmother taught me "the doggie song."

• Listening to Papa's jokes. Papa had a new joke ready for us with just about every visit. I think we enjoyed his delight in telling them even more than the jokes themselves. So, I will help Sophie learn to tell knock-knock jokes, even though jokes aren't exactly my bag. Because it is fun to be silly, and it is a good thing to want to make someone laugh. 

• Playing "patterns" in Granny's back bedroom. Because my grandmother sewed so much for us, she had tons of patterns, and I would play "store" with all her patterns for hours on end in the back bedroom. Sophie's "patterns" may well be her Patti-Grams enormous stash of costume jewelry, but the lesson for me is that the best toys are often the most unlikely.

• Going to TG&Y with Papa to buy a Malibu Barbie. There is no real way of knowing how many times Papa bought me the same exact Barbie doll. He never said "no" or "why don't you get something different." That was what I wanted, and that was what he bought.     For my children, I am learning that Sophie and Patti-Grams sharing a love of junk stores is really fine - a part of their relationship - and I should just stay out of it (especially when the said junk stays at Patti-Grams'!)

• Listening to Granny's stories. I didn't realize what a good story teller Granny was until I realized how much family history I remember from her stories. One of my favorites was the story about Dad beating Granny back home on his first day of kindergarten. I especially loved when she would tell us about Dad, Aunt Judy, and Uncle James getting into some kind of trouble! Through her stories about losing her infant daughter, Gaynelle, I realized at a young age that the death of a child is something a parent never quite gets over. For me, I am learning to talk not only about the present and the future, but to not 
• forget to talk about the past. I want my children to have uninterrupted time with my Patti-Grams and Tato, so they can hear their perspective on our family history. My children have a very rich heritage, and I want to be certain they are blessed by knowing about it.

Though thinking about Granny and Papa is bittersweet, I am so thankful for the ways in which they shaped me. I am grateful for the treasures that they poured into my life that I am able to unpack and pass on years later. I'm amazed as I realize that though they have been gone for several years, through these treasures, they are shaping the lives of my children.